Local homeowner’s stab at naming Applewood Acres’ most famous son or daughter entirely within realm of possibility
- G Papa Tango
- Mar 8
- 4 min read

In the quaint, tree-lined streets of Applewood Acres, where gossip swirls like autumn leaves and the biggest news is a new flavor at the local bakery, one resident has taken it upon themselves to tackle a question as old as time: Who is the most illustrious figure to emerge from our humble hamlet?
Enter Mr. Timothy Jenkins, a jovial soul known for his penchant for puns and a knack for turning the mundane into mirth. At a recent neighborhood gathering, amidst the aroma of freshly brewed coffee and Mrs. Henderson's famous lemon squares, Mr. Jenkins seized the moment to propose his candidate for Applewood's most renowned resident.
"With great deliberation and a dash of whimsy," Mr. Jenkins proclaimed, "I hereby nominate none other than Harold Picklesworth, Esq., esteemed inventor of the automatic garden hose reel!"
The assembly erupted into laughter, the notion of Applewood Acres boasting a household name akin to Edison or Einstein seeming as far-fetched as a unicorn trotting down Main Street.
Yet, therein lies the charm of Mr. Jenkins's suggestion—it remains entirely within the realm of possibility. In a neighborhood where the most significant event of the year is the annual pie-baking contest and the closest thing to a celebrity sighting is spotting Old Man Thompson's prized goat wandering off again, Mr. Picklesworth's invention of the garden hose reel stands as a beacon of achievement.
While other locales may boast of famous sons and daughters—renowned actors, acclaimed authors, or celebrated musicians—Applewood Acres takes pride in its own brand of fame, where the ordinary is extraordinary and the everyday heroes are the ones who mend fences, bake pies, and keep the community thriving.
As the evening drew to a close, with bellies full of laughter and promises of another gathering soon, Mr. Jenkins's proposal lingered in the air, a gentle reminder that in a world obsessed with fame and fortune, sometimes the most remarkable individuals are the ones who make our corner of the world a little brighter, one garden hose reel at a time.

FURTHERMOREOVERKILL
G Papa Tango, what is thought to be the best, time-tested recipe for apple pie?
One of the most beloved and time-tested recipes for apple pie is the classic American version, known for its buttery, flaky crust and sweet, cinnamon-spiced apple filling. Here's a traditional recipe that has stood the test of time:
Ingredients:
For the crust:
2 ½ cups all-purpose flour
1 cup unsalted butter, cold and cubed
1 teaspoon salt
1 teaspoon granulated sugar
6-8 tablespoons ice water
For the filling:
6-7 medium-sized apples (such as Granny Smith or Honeycrisp), peeled, cored, and thinly sliced
¾ cup granulated sugar
2 tablespoons all-purpose flour
1 teaspoon ground cinnamon
¼ teaspoon ground nutmeg
1 tablespoon lemon juice
2 tablespoons unsalted butter, diced
For assembly:
1 egg, beaten (for egg wash)
Granulated sugar, for sprinkling

Instructions:
Prepare the crust: In a large mixing bowl, combine the flour, salt, and sugar. Add the cold, cubed butter. Using a pastry cutter or your fingertips, work the butter into the flour mixture until it resembles coarse crumbs. Gradually add the ice water, 1 tablespoon at a time, mixing gently with a fork until the dough just comes together. Divide the dough into two equal portions, shape each into a disc, wrap in plastic wrap, and refrigerate for at least 1 hour.
Preheat the oven: Preheat your oven to 425°F (220°C). Place a baking sheet on the middle rack to preheat along with the oven.
Prepare the filling: In a large bowl, combine the sliced apples, granulated sugar, flour, cinnamon, nutmeg, and lemon juice. Toss until the apples are evenly coated.
Roll out the crust: On a lightly floured surface, roll out one disc of dough into a circle large enough to fit your pie dish. Transfer the dough to the pie dish, gently pressing it into the bottom and sides.
Fill the pie: Spoon the apple filling into the prepared pie crust, mounding it slightly in the center. Dot the top of the filling with diced butter.
Top the pie: Roll out the second disc of dough and place it over the filling. Trim any excess dough and crimp the edges to seal. Cut a few slits in the top crust to allow steam to escape. Optionally, brush the top crust with beaten egg and sprinkle with granulated sugar for a golden, crispy finish.
Bake the pie: Place the pie on the preheated baking sheet and bake for 45-55 minutes, or until the crust is golden brown and the filling is bubbling. If the edges of the crust start to brown too quickly, cover them with foil halfway through baking.
Cool and serve: Allow the pie to cool on a wire rack for at least 2 hours before slicing and serving. Serve warm with a scoop of vanilla ice cream for a classic treat.
This timeless apple pie recipe is sure to delight your taste buds and evoke feelings of warmth and nostalgia with every bite. Enjoy!

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